I don’t think I would have been able to have a daughter. I would have freaked out.
Paul Arcand was recently invited to the show For Once, where he sat down for thoughtful conversations with familiar figures from his circle.
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Did you see something? Discretion guaranteed.
Among these conversations, Paul notably spoke with Pascale Renaud-Hébert, who approached more intimate topics—his family life, his journey, and his children—in a dialogue that was both sensitive and sincere.
Seated across from him, Pascale Renaud-Hébert asked what it had meant for him to raise boys, given that he has two.
He would have been unable to have a daughter?
“A challenge first… because there is no instruction manual, then my kids, I had them young… Actually, my first was what? 25 years old. Then the second, almost 27. So, kids very young. I worked a lot, but at the same time, I hosted the morning show. I mean, in the afternoon, most of the time, I was at home. I didn’t have lunch with my kids because I worked, but I spent a lot of time with them anyway. Then I split up: they were teenagers, so that creates different dynamics. But I don’t think I would have been capable of having a daughter. I would have freaked out,” he recounts, continuing with a statement that surprised Pascale, who then asked him why he believed he wouldn’t have been capable.
“My partner has a daughter, and to say: OK, she’s the one who’s leaving.… It’s not that I don’t trust… But it’s like,” explains Paul, wanting to convey that he would have been more anxious.
Has Paul Arcand been present enough for his children?
The host then pressed him on how his children would describe him, and what he might add.
“What they probably wouldn’t tell me is that I could have been more present. I can see it, and I’m not just talking about me: I’m from a generation of parents who worked a lot, and it’s a choice, and I fully own it. So, working a lot means being less available. I see that, for my kids, spending quality time—not just time with their own kids, but quality time—is important. So they would probably say that I didn’t spend enough time with them… Probably also that they might (laugh) describe my friendly demeanor. I remember, they were small, and, you know, you always have a trouble with customer service somewhere, you know. So I would call, and they would sit there, as kids, on the bed, and they would watch me,” he recounts, reenacting the scene and his exchanges, amused to see his children react and ask for more.
Pascale then noted that he had perhaps taught them the importance of clearly expressing their needs. He nodded, saying he believed so.
Conclusion
A moving exchange that shines a light on a reality shared by many parents: the generation gap, changing expectations… and the life choices we make, sometimes at the cost of certain things.
Being a parent, as Paul puts it, doesn’t come with an instruction manual. And sometimes, since it’s everyone’s first life, we move forward by trial and error, doing our best and learning along the way…
Did you see yourself in this conversation? Have you made choices that today your kids might tell you they’d like to see differently?
This content was created with the help of AI.
